Dirk ...

And so I'm back again , and all because of him ..

Dirk Bogarde, he is my new obsession, and has been for the past few days :D .
I'm really really obsessed with him, obsessed with this beautiful man. I normally won't call a man "beautiful" because I believe beautiful should be used only for women. next to Bogarde I think the only 2 men I can describe as beautiful are the young Tyrone Power and the young Alain Delon. But, I never wrote a post about Alain Delon or Tyrone Power (I think !) And never was that obsessed with them either ! actually I was never obsessed with any beautiful or handsome actor that much!.
I'm a normal woman who loves a handsome, let alone a Manly-Beautiful man. But in Dirk's case  I believe that what made him different to me is his persona ,The human not the actor .
I knew the name for more than 25 years, I knew the older Bogarde some how from TV, of course the "Face" was to catch any normal female's eye even if a teen age female ;). And then the name was said to be homosexual in the closet who passed away in 1999.
Back then, I never bothered to look his movies up though I love movies especially old ones, In fact I don't like the idea of homosexuality at all, it's against my religion and against what I believe is nature's intentions (sexual-wise) regardless of religion. So I didn't think I needed another Rock Hudson who was the SHOCK of my early teens!.
But that's not what I'm talking about any way. What I'm talking about is the good chance that made me, after all those years, And after me becoming a more edge-polished person who would take the good side form any given and ignore the bad, watch a small funny movie for Dirk and I liked the face, the body too as I like slender men, and of course the voice, the way he talked.

And so the journey of discovering this actor began - a fine actor he was but that's another story :) - and led to discovering this Man, I've watched a number of his movies and watched I think All his interviews that are available on Youtube .audio or video. And I was struck in awe.
The man is insightful in an awesome way I never imagined from an actor, he is intelligent,  honest to himself above all, a believer in most of what he did in his life, a gentleman who never tells, man of no none-sense who rose above the image of a star in a time when all had to be stars no matter how much it ate them - Judy and Marilyn and Elvis are perfect examples - .
I always believed that the British or Europeans in general are deeper than the new world people but Bogarde struck me really.
And so I fell in love with this man who admitted that the war had the hugest impact on him, a young man in his early 20s , that it made him want to get married during the war then he decided to live for himself, and never get married because he didn't want to bring children to the misery of this world, Regardless of him being homosexual or not, he could have accepted the star-arranged marriages of the era, He admitted that he is a selfish - an Aries is always selfish charmer I assure you :) -  who would want to be left to his privacy and enjoy himself the way he pleased with no attachment to family or kids. That his mother reflected her aches and yearning for stage acting on the family. and That he didn't want a younger brother at the age of 13-14.  That he made some films for the money and made some for his own pleasure as a mature actor. That he loved his country the way he wanted it not the way it became and so he left it !.And that he let down a friend in need because that was the only thing to do to save himself, and that he regretted it. I became obsessed with him because I believed every word he said in every interview I listened to, because what he said touched a hundred nerve and rang a hundred bell in me.
I love most that he never submitted to the idea of pretty-boy with good genes which kept him look younger than he is.
He might have been a homosexual, though I'd really hate the idea of this beauty and charm being wasted on another man :S, but I don't care, I still want to read his books and his autobiographies and listen to any interview with him I come across.

A final note; one of the most striking comments on a picture of anybody I have ever read was on a Facebook's photo of Dirk, this photo

and the comment read : "The face of a human who has lived a Life, marvelous" by a fan named Jeanette Trumeau.


P.S. On my newly-started journey to find out about him I found that I'm not the only one who re-discovered Dirk :)
http://discoveringdirkbogarde.blogspot.com

liked this link too :) http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/books/article-1050508/Dirks-good-life--bad-spelling-EVER-DIRK-edited-John-Coldstream.html